When You Are Engulfed in Flames

I just finished reading the new David Sedaris book, When You are Engulfed in Flames. It had me in stitches a few times but it still doesn't top my favorite Me Talk Pretty One Day.

Here's a little snippet from his chapter titled Smoking. It is his diary entries from when he decided to quit smoking. (this isn't verbatim cause I can't find the actual lines, but you'll get the idea.) Setting: Paris, David's sister Amy Sedaris has come for a visit and David has decided to try to learn to speak Japanese.

David: Amy, will you please help me with my Japanese flash cards.
Amy: Ok, how do you say "do you have a cigarette?"
David: I don't know.
Amy: Ok, how do you say "I will give you a blow job for a cigarette."
David: sigh. I don't know.
Amy: Ok, how do you say "Oh my goodness I've gotten quite fat since I quit smoking cigarettes!"
David: Nevermind, I'll do this myself.